User blog:One-Eyed Serpent/Never Stand Alone (ARC 2) - Chapter 9 - We All Fall Down

-- [side:RYUU] --

Okay, pissing them off like that right after having (maybe) a traumatic experience might not be the best thing to do.

I heaved out a quiet, grief-filled sigh as I slumped back down on my hospital bed.

It has to be done, though. I’m still reeling from remembering everything – my siblings, who I am, what I am, Original, Uncle, the Kill – and it all so… so…

I hissed when my head throbbed in pain, still overworked and tender from the mental abuse it was suddenly subjected to. It doesn’t help that my defective neural cells are still in the process of finally recovering. Here’s to hoping I get better memory from now on.

“Sir, I have the tranquil- have they left?” I looked up blandly at the nurse, my expression saying ‘of course, as you can see’. She rolled her eyes back at me, and approached, holding up the syringe. I sighed, and gestured to my IV drip. “See you in about 5 hours, Mister Izanami.”

“Yeah, yeah.” I muttered, waiting for the nurse to finally leave. I sighed again. “The guy’s dead though.”

Feeling the tranquilizers take effect, I close my eyes and took a nap.

--

The first thing I did as soon as I woke up was to grab my mangled arm. Uncoordinated, clumsy fingers skittered over my arm erratically – my control was lacking, with the medicine and the… ordeal I went through recently – as I probed and checked my arm.

While I was asleep, the elbow had finished forming, and my Oracle Cells are halfway down the forearm, healing much more rapidly.

It was strange; that my suppressed memories also suppressed my abilities. I can feel it in my body, in the Cells fixing me; yearning to go faster. More speed. I had forgotten that everything my very body was made for speed; healing, fighting, even endurance. I was always quick to tire, and undoubtedly now more than ever. But my healing… This was quite a luxury. I have no hesitation in proclaiming I’ll have the title of fastest healing rate in Blood. Actually, maybe out of All the God Eaters of the Far East, my healing is top-notch.

I don’t know about him…

Ah, Him. Original. Now I know exactly why I want to be around the guy. I thought I was merely fulfilling my duty to Director. I forgot the other half.

My complete hand left its inspection of my healing arm, clutching at the hospital robe right over my heart. I didn’t cry; no, couldn’t cry. Not anymore. My brothers and sisters… I fulfilled the first part of my promise to them; now I will work hard to fulfill the second. I can’t fail them. Failure is not an option anymore. They’ve sacrificed themselves for me to live, and I carry their will and their essence. My reason to fight is complete, now that I remember everything.

We’ve been made to protect the world; and protect it I shall.

<p class="MsoNormal">For them. For Uncle. For Aunt Leona. For everyone who worked hard to give us life. For the residents of the Outer Ghetto. For everyone in FRIAR. For Blood… For Original.

<p class="MsoNormal">I released the article of clothing, slumping back down further into the bed, almost sinking into it.

<p class="MsoNormal">Now that I think about it… Calling Original ‘Original’ sounds… weird, when I had somehow established some sort of friendship with him. Not that I mind; being a friend to him was an honor. When I was younger, I always thought we’d be servants.

<p class="MsoNormal">But then again, he doesn’t know we – I – are clones of him.

<p class="MsoNormal">Wait.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Shit. Scheiße. Kuso.” I swore, eyes widening though I had enough presence of mind to not idiotically sit up.

<p class="MsoNormal">''He doesn’t know. He doesn’t know''.

<p class="MsoNormal">Fuck, shouldn’t he be able to?

<p class="MsoNormal">I mean, I am roughly 80-90% directly made out of his Cells! His Oracle Cells. He should be able to feel a connection to me, just like I could feel a small, niggling sensation at the back of my head; three of them for each extension of me. Kyrie Eleison, Shuuten Douji, Goshadokuro. They’re connected to me via Oracle Cells. I am made out of his Oracle Cells.

<p class="MsoNormal">How the fuck did he didn’t react?!

<p class="MsoNormal">“Oh! Mister Izanami!” I twitched at the alias. Had she not heard that ‘Ryuuka Izanami’ is dead? “You’re awake.”

<p class="MsoNormal">Oh, I haven’t noticed.

<p class="MsoNormal">I watched the ceiling with unfocused eyes, my periphery noting my nurse – I think here name is Eleanor or something? – flitted around me, worrying and going through the usual questions. I answered them dully, almost reflexively. I can’t help it; I am stable as Romeo on a tightrope (trust me, he’s good), my Oracle Cells are no longer acting up, my suppressed abilities have been regained, and so are my memories.

<p class="MsoNormal">Never before had I felt complete. But at the same time, oh so broken.

<p class="MsoNormal">“You must be pretty popular, Mister Izanami,” The nurse mused aloud suddenly. I gave her a questioning look. “Just a couple of hours after your Squad mates left, Mister Schicksal himself and Miss Kusunoki stayed with you for a while. I understand Miss Kusunoki; you been her playmate the past few months, no?”

<p class="MsoNormal">My eyebrow rose higher at the term ‘playmate’. Did we really look like ‘playmates’…? Well, maybe it was due to the way were acting like toddlers on sugar high when we get our hands on whatever machinery we get. That or messing with my God Arc and with Shuuten Douji.

<p class="MsoNormal">“But I’m surprised that Mister Schicksal visited. I know that he’d gotten closer to his Squad, Cradle, and gotten better with dealing with other people over the years, but to go out of his way for you…” The nurse looked at me over her shoulder. “Just what are you to him?”

<p class="MsoNormal">Is… Is that jealousy I hear? Oh, this is rich. “Hah?” As appealing the idea of driving my nurse up the walls, I have to behave. For the sake of my arm, if nothing else.

<p class="MsoNormal">She gasped suddenly, flushing, and she whirled on me, pointing at me accusingly. “D-Don’t tell me you’re…!” How impressive, that she arrived on an assumption that is similar to my thoughts just a moment ago.

<p class="MsoNormal">I gave her my most unimpressed look. “I think you’ve been reading one too many homosexual novels.” I stated drily, and my lips curled evilly when she sputtered and turned a brighter red. It contrasted distinctly with her pale blonde hair, and it amused me to no end.

<p class="MsoNormal">But the thought that she thought that Soma and I are like that... I feel like retching. It was disgusting, depraved, wrong and most of all insulting to be accused of something like that. Doubly, no, triply so that Soma – of all people – was associated with this.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Really, it’s so vexing.”

<p class="MsoNormal">I stilled. That tone of voice was all wrong. Too light, too casual.

<p class="MsoNormal">Her left hand is in the wrong position.

<p class="MsoNormal">“People keep visiting Mister Izanami. Blood, the Claudius. Kusunoki. Even Schicksal’s damned spawn.” The nurse muttered. I shifted ever so slightly.

<p class="MsoNormal">I wonder if the idiots even checked the hospital register when they brought me in.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Well, whatever, you’re still weak. That tranquilizer has a paralyzing toxin; weak enough not to kill or fully paralyze, but enough to slow you down.”

<p class="MsoNormal">Ahh, so that’s why my movements aren’t as precise. She’s good.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Now… I think it’s time for a permanent rest!” Obviously, this attacker of mine is human, since she failed to hear the footsteps just right outside the door.

<p class="MsoNormal">Psh, idiot.

<p class="MsoNormal">She leapt at me with a quiet, vicious snarl, one hand holding a military knife obviously laced with more potent poison than the one in my body.

<p class="MsoNormal">I frowned. She does know that as God Eaters, only Aragami poison can kill us.

<p class="MsoNormal">Right?

<p class="MsoNormal">At best, this one would only put us in extreme pain in under an hour; the Oracle Cells in our body Devouring the weak and flimsy poison.

<p class="MsoNormal">So with that in mind, I put on a face of alarm, and raised my undamaged arm, feeling the knife pierce skin, tear through muscles and get inevitably stuck between the ulna and the radius. I let out a glorified scream, just for kicks and to alert the people outside (I might kick them if they failed to smell my blood spilling). With a feral laugh, not-nurse twisted the knife to unhook it from my bones.

<p class="MsoNormal">I hissed at that; bitch ain’t gentle.

<p class="MsoNormal">The door was practically torn off its hinges just as Little Miss Crazy here began to stab me over and over, trying to hit me in a vital part. I blocked several with my (not)undamaged arm – Miss Leah would throw a fit – and I sighed heavily in relief when the not-nurse was violently ripped off of me.

<p class="MsoNormal">My savior snarled, wild and animalistic that I shuddered in fear, throwing the woman across the room to hit the wall with a loud smack (is that a bone snapping I hear?) and slump down in dead faint. That was a bit anticlimactic. I hope they didn’t kill her; I still need to have her for… purposes. Did you know? Unprovoked attacks on God Eaters warrant a one way trip to the prison. If not, you’re en route to outside the Wall.

<p class="MsoNormal">I was suddenly suffocated by soft yet firm… ahem, Leah hugged me tightly, frantic by the rapid way she was talking that she was tripping over her words. I rolled my eyes.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Has it ever occurred to you, my lovely people, to check the hospital register?” I asked blandly, as soon as there was a lull in Leah’s fussing. “Were you really that panicked that you just handed me off to the first person to assure that I’ll recover? Tut tut; that’s a bad habit to get into- ow!”

<p class="MsoNormal">Leah whapped me on the head a second time, and I winced when my head throbbed and the poison burned through my veins, traversing my body.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Don’t give me lip, you stupid brat!” Leah barked. I stared in amazement. “First you get into fights with your team, then you run away, then you somehow detonated yourself and now this?! I’ve never seen you play poker or dice but your luck is goddamn awful.”

<p class="MsoNormal">“Holy shit, you swore.” I was tempted to smack myself at my awe-inspiring eloquence and crass mouth. Wait, I’ve been swearing way longer than this. Oh well.

<p class="MsoNormal">I got a few more swats, and Leah only stopped when someone snarled somewhere behind her. I pulled myself up with the help of Leah (who finally decided that I was enough pain from her tender care and the poison to fix me) and peeked over her shoulder.

<p class="MsoNormal">I blinked.

<p class="MsoNormal">For some reason, Soma looked like he was ready to murder someone.

<p class="MsoNormal">I could feel the tugging, actually; his Core calling out to its extensions. I whimpered as quietly as I could, trying not to clutch at my chest where it was suddenly so tight. If he couldn’t feel my reaction to him, then there is something awfully wrong.

<p class="MsoNormal">Soma hissed something to Gil and Julius – the two of them standing between him and my bed. Why is that? – and in response Gil snapped back something at him, just as quiet but nonetheless threatening. I couldn’t see my squad mates’ faces; why are they acting like that?

<p class="MsoNormal">Cold, blue eyes with slit pupils looked over to me-

<p class="MsoNormal">Ah.

<p class="MsoNormal">I’m an idiot.

<p class="MsoNormal">And an arrogant one at that too.

<p class="MsoNormal">Tell me why did I assume he didn’t know? Oh, because he never said anything and I jumped to conclusions. Of fucking course he would know what I am; he’s Johannes’ son for fuck’s sake. And while people he is the most powerful God Eater that was specifically engineered to kill Aragami, people tend to forget he had taken up his father – and mother’s – profession of being a researcher. He may not be as wily as Miss Rachel or Director Sakaki, he is still phenomenally smart.

<p class="MsoNormal">And I was an idiot for forgetting that fact.

<p class="MsoNormal">He may not know what exactly am I, but he suspects. Maybe since the first time we met, actually. And he has Johannes’ things to go through.

<p class="MsoNormal">I met the blue gaze evenly, even though all I wanted to do was curl up and hide – he could see my misery, dammit, he isn’t supposed to see, he shouldn’t know, fuck – I kept my head up.

<p class="MsoNormal">Soma’s shoulders sagged, and he gently pushed through my two guardians (it seems that way, I don’t know) coming to stand at the foot of my bed. He didn’t say anything as he looked down at me.

<p class="MsoNormal">I bowed my head. “I’m sorry.”

<p class="MsoNormal">The silence of the room was unbearable.

<p class="MsoNormal">“You never said anything.” He stated. His voice was flat, emotionless. But to me, it sounded accusing.

<p class="MsoNormal">I flinched.

<p class="MsoNormal">Leah pulled the needle away from my neck, afraid that she had hurt me. I shook my head at her, motioning to continue. She did so, and I realized it was a shot of Oracle Cell blood. Original’s blood, actually. I hissed and twitched as the undiluted blood entered my bloodstream, devouring the poisoned tissues and cells and immediately heading to my arms, where they kick started my healing.

<p class="MsoNormal">I howled in pain as bone in my left arm was mended forcibly; growing and solidifying at a breakneck pace, the marrow producing fresh blood to replace all that I’ve lost. Muscle fibers wove and overlapped, covering the bone, and soon the veins and arteries followed, a morbidly intricate net of pathways for my blood to flow through. Soon skin sheathed the limbed fully, a tad paler (and fully absent of my burn scars; actually, my whole arm is missing my trademark burnt skin) than the skin on the rest of my body. My fingers bled as nails pushed through the skin, staining the bed sheets below me even redder, I’m sure.

<p class="MsoNormal">My right arm bled even more the blackened blood (poison filled, do not touch) was ejected through the wounds there. My broken bones snapped back into place with a sickening crack – making my howling pitch higher – the scars sealed close, and only then I was finally able to breathe.

<p class="MsoNormal">I panted heavily as I lay, tired from weathering the onslaught of pain the sped up healing inflicted on me. I lifted my arms to see the results – I grimaced when they felt like they were weighted too heavily to be comfortable – and my grimace deepened further when I realized that yes, my left arm is healed, my muscles, on the other hand were atrophied too badly.

<p class="MsoNormal">I need to retrain this arm. And fast.

<p class="MsoNormal">I pushed up from my bed, flinging the covers – bloodied and dirtied, disgusting, like me – haphazardly to the side. I winced when my tender muscles protested, but I ignored it, meeting the gazes of the people in the room.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Believe it or not,” I began, not meeting Soma’s eyes. “I forgot.”

<p class="MsoNormal">They gave me time to collect my thoughts in silence, and I was grateful for it. I clenched and unclenched the cotton pants I’m wearing, crumpling the cloth.

<p class="MsoNormal">“My brain was never fully stable. Result of being an experiment, most likely. Physical… and mental trauma damaged my brain, all in a span of four hours,” I held up four fingers to emphasize the time – 4,458 hours, all it took for my life to shatter, my fragile, fake, dispensable life – as I smiled dryly. “That’s a surefire way to get amnesia via trauma.” I paused, trying to hide the shudder than lanced down my back as I tried all my might not to break down and fall into a deep abyss of grieving.

<p class="MsoNormal">I should be glad; that I’m still alive at this point. In this world, life is as fragile as a butterfly; ephemeral and oh so delicate.

<p class="MsoNormal">I brought a hand up to absently knead at my scalp. “It’s amusing that oftentimes its physical or mental trauma cures a person of their amnesia. The human body is a funny thing don’t you think?” I sighed, suddenly feeling very tired. But I can’t drop like a rock and sleep everything away. They need whatever questions answered; I owe them that much. “You know… It would be definitely easier if you ask questions instead of me starting from the beginning of my sob story.”

<p class="MsoNormal">They only hesitated for a moment, before the interrogation began. I knew they were stalling the hardest parts; asking inane questions like my name – Ulrich Diener, BFC 00 – where I was raised when I was taken from Glasgow – it used to be called Syria, now it’s just a barren wasteland – had I remembered Gilbert – of course, you motherfuckers, shitty Gilbert was my first bestfriend, goddamit – where was I when my second home fell.

<p class="MsoNormal">That was difficult.

<p class="MsoNormal">I took a slow sip of water, prolonging the silence. I didn’t have to look where my attacker was unconsciously slumped over – they injected her with tranquilizers, she won’t be up for six more hours – where Soma was standing. I’m confident he knows about this, at least, even if just a part. His father liked his journals, after all.

<p class="MsoNormal">“I was found… by a man named Johannes von Schicksal. He found me some time after the Facility was razed to the ground; everything was blurry so that’s all I can remember. He found me, and took me back to his base of operations. Fenrir’s Far East Branch. But he didn’t hide me within the walls, no, it was ironically safer for me outside the wall, where no one could find me. He was right, no one found me, and only he knows where I used to live.” I hooked my thumb over my middle finger, pulling it down until it emitted a sharp crack that signified of the trapped nitrogen between the bones popping. “I was mostly left to my devices to recuperate. But he would visit me multiple times a year, if infrequently. I guess…” I swallowed down the obstruction in my throat. When did that get there? “I guess he was guilty for letting his nephews and nieces die while he wasn’t there.”

<p class="MsoNormal">A sharp intake of breath, I didn’t look at any one of them. I turned my gaze on my hands. They were shaking. Shit.

<p class="MsoNormal">I clasped them together. Tightly. I dug my nails into the flesh, and I was unsatisfied by the red, crescent welts that formed. I had hoped they could cut deeper than that.

<p class="MsoNormal">“But well, not all good thing last, as they say. On year 2071, three years ago, Johannes von Schicksal was proclaimed dead due to an accident in the Aegis Island. A few months later after that news, my hideout was destroyed by an Aragami. I never knew what it was; it attacked during the night, but I had taken to calling it Niddhoggr. You know, the ‘Black Dragon’.” I chuckled sardonically at my own joke. It was lame as hell, and further solidifies that humor isn’t one of my strong points. “So… Tadah! I ended up wandering outside the wall; it was far from the Main Branch, until Julius found me.”

<p class="MsoNormal">I don’t think I’m a good story teller. If anything, they looked like they have more questions.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Are… Are there anyone else like you?” It was Julius that asked that.

<p class="MsoNormal">I tightened the grip on my hands. “Yes.”

<p class="MsoNormal">“How many?”

<p class="MsoNormal">“I have four ‘sisters’ and six ‘brothers’.”

<p class="MsoNormal">“… Where are they…?”

<p class="MsoNormal">I really, really have to choke down a sob at that one. I smelled the metallic tang of blood – coming from the hand, oops, not sorry – and I took a couple of seconds to just remember breathing before answering. “Killed. I’m all that’s left of the Bias Factor Clones.”

<p class="MsoNormal">I noticed that Hiro had gotten up and left with an unreadable look on his face. I don’t care; it was good that he shouldn’t be burdened of my… ''tragique histoire. ''My tragic tale.

<p class="MsoNormal">I hate myself.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Who were you cloned after?”

<p class="MsoNormal">A nigh manic laugh tore itself at my throat. He dares ask who when he fucking knows now?!

<p class="MsoNormal">“And isn’t that a good joke, Schicksal?!” I spat at him, a hand coming to clutch at my throbbing head, I hissed, but soldiered on. He may be that guy, but fuck him. “Who are we cloned from!”

<p class="MsoNormal">“Ryuuka-“

<p class="MsoNormal">“IT’S ULRICH, GOD FUCKING DAMMIT!” I screamed at Leah, pushing her off almost violently. I didn’t care. It hurts too much.

<p class="MsoNormal">Must retaliate, don’t let anyone hurt you, ithurtsithurstithurtsguysiwantyoubackUnclehowcouldyou-

<p class="MsoNormal">I snapped around to look at Soma, who had yet to move or even react. ''Bastard. ''

<p class="MsoNormal">“I’m motherfucking Ulrich Diener, Bias Factor Clone Number Double-Zero. The Prototype. And it’s fucking lovely, to meet you, Original.” I hissed. Blue eyes were empty, and I hated him for it, even though I was both captivated by those same eyes. “Or should I call you Father?!”

<p class="MsoNormal">“Ryuuka – Ulrich – fuck, whatever, just calm down, Jesus!” I scrambled away when Gilbert tried to touch me, my mouth bared in a grimace. I didn’t look at his face, knowing that he’ll have a look of confusion and hurt on his face.

<p class="MsoNormal">I’m sorry, I never wanted to hurt anyone.

<p class="MsoNormal">“We – the Bias Factor Clones – were made from Soma Schicksal’s very cells. Half-Aragami Cells.” I breathed out shakily.

<p class="MsoNormal">I could see the words in my mind’s eye, the documents transcribing our existence hovering at the back of my head with taunting clarity.

<p class="MsoNormal">“P73 Bias Factor can’t be safely injected into young adults, it’s too powerful, they’ll only get Devoured. But the Managarm Project had found a way around that issue.” I remember Uncle – Director, I hissed at myself – would tell stories about his son, his wife, and the Project that made our Original. “They – the head researchers - injected the Bias Factor into the fetus of their growing child while still developing in the womb. It was a success, but the Oracle Cells dominated the human cells and essentially turned him more of an Aragami instead of a human. Human bodies weren’t made to handle such copious amounts of unstable – developing – Oracle Cells. The gestation period was a nightmare; Aisha Gauche was dying the closer her birthing date came.”

<p class="MsoNormal">How laughable; he didn’t expect me to know about his origins.

<p class="MsoNormal">“While the father and son survived, the mother didn’t. It’s very saddening, really. She was highly recognized, and it would be a pleasure to be able to meet her. But back to the ‘product’ of Managarm Project.” I met Soma’s eyes; those eyes shifting from circular to slit, the turmoil evident in those blues. “The child is literally born to combat Aragami, you know. Unprecedented healing, strength, everything; he’s a perfect Aragami killing machine. He was also the very basis of the God Arc we use. How relevant is all this? Well, you saw how he was ‘born’. If the Director would take pregnant mothers, for the sake of producing more P73 God Eaters, but at the cost of their lives, it would be a great blow to Fenrir’s reputation, won’t it? Maybe the Director doesn’t want to happen to others what happened to the mother of the First God Eater, who knows? His mind is a confusing thing.

<p class="MsoNormal">“So he comes up with the solution of taking the Managarm child’s hybrid cells and dilute them with a bit more human cells. It worked. There were troubles at first, with the prototype. The basic nervous system was skewed, but there were upsides, like the abnormally rapid growth rate. And the complete, utter obedience. Never forget the obedience. Ten more followed the prototype, but the others were more complete. They were perfected. Like Original, all ten showed the most promise as God Eaters.”

<p class="MsoNormal">I spread my arms out mockingly, slapping a grin on my face that was equal parts anguished and furious.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Aren’t you glad that you still have a Clone alive? Me, the Prototype? With my existence, Fenrir could restart the Bias Factor Clone Project, if they only so wished! I’ll have more siblings to look after and spoil!” I mocked. I ignored if it sounded desperate and sad. “They sacrificed their lives for me, you know. The other ten. They died when the Facility was attacked. They saved me so I could find you, the Original.”

<p class="MsoNormal">I had to forcefully bite my tongue at that point; anymore and I would break down further than I already had. Just when I had begun patching myself up – to a semblance of being whole, at least. I’m scared. I know if I’ll break, I won’t be able to be fixed.

<p class="MsoNormal">Third time’s the charm, as they say.

<p class="MsoNormal">I stumbled off the bed, ignoring Leah’s halfhearted attempts in getting me to lie back down. I don’t care at the moment. I want to be alone. I need to be alone. I have to get away from them. I just need a reminder that I can’t break down. Not yet. Not yet. I still have a lot to do.

<p class="MsoNormal">I grabbed my clothes – the ones I wore during the Resonance Incident, despite it being blood stained, stinks like hell and the left arm of the tight shirt torn off at the sleeve. I took them to the bathroom and I changed there, haphazardly leaving my hospital clothes on the hamper beneath the sink.

<p class="MsoNormal">I left and walked past them silently, and they didn’t even try to stop me.

<p class="MsoNormal">People would gawk and stare as I walked the halls, and I paid them no mind. I simply made my way to FRIAR’s God Arc Hangar, where I took Kyrie Eleison from her tank from a distressed Damian. After that I rode down to the DEMAS R&D. I pulled a few strings, ignoring the way they were looking at me in favor of making my way to where Shuuten Douji was sleeping. A small, barely there hum begins in the back of my mind, and I let myself smile faintly as I easily scaled my behemoth of a ‘Jinki Hei’ to reach the hatch on the back, where it was opened for me. I didn’t plan on Merging; I just want to be alone.

<p class="MsoNormal">So I carefully drop down into the cockpit, Kyrie’s haft poking out the hatch above my head as she was too long to really fit in here. I curled up, the flat of the Spear’s blade a comfortable pressure on my side, and I closed my eyes.

<p class="MsoNormal">I went to sleep.

<p class="MsoNormal">--

<p class="MsoNormal">When the alarms blared to life, I might’ve sworn in various languages (that I barely knew I remembered) when I accidentally rolled over too much to the left and ended up slicing myself with Kyrie Eleison.

<p class="MsoNormal">I sighed with discomfort as I watched my flesh weave itself to normalcy.

<p class="MsoNormal">I pulled myself up and out of Shuuten Douji, frowning when I saw my fellow DEMAS Riders running around in controlled chaos as they prepared and geared up for piloting.

<p class="MsoNormal">Every single one of their faces was grim.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Rider Izanami, sir!” I looked down at the one who called up to me – I remember his name as Frank or Fred, not sure, maybe it was his twin -, gesturing for him to get out of his salutations (isn’t that strange?) and talk. The frown on his face deepened. This isn’t good. “Hordes of them beasties out there, sir. Marduks, Sariels, Borgs, Ukons, Kongous. The whole works. There are also reportedly Fallens in the number, too.”

<p class="MsoNormal">I swore. I sleep and this happens? My luck is staggering.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Head count. ETA. Directions?” I snapped as I swung my legs out of the cockpit and lifted up Kyrie.

<p class="MsoNormal">“More or less a couple thousand Aragami, sir! Coming from all directions and would hammer down hard in an hour.”

<p class="MsoNormal">“Fucking shit. How many can fight?” I jumped down, heading to my cubicle over at the Research Department to get my DEMAS Armor. No time to join Blood; might as well fight with the Riders.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Three-fourths of the amount the Aragami has. DEMAS Riders accounted for. Cradle is almost at the Walls.” He paused outside my workplace as I hastily stripped, throwing modesty out the window as I rushed to put on my own gear.

<p class="MsoNormal">It was three months since I’ve worn the specific DEMAS Armor for Shuuten Douji. Blood δ used physical controls as means of operation; Shuuten Douji and Goshadokuro have nothing like that.

<p class="MsoNormal">I hissed when the needles imbedded themselves into my skin, and the core on my chest briefly glowed crimson when my Oracle Cells reacted with the Armor and activated it. I took the helmet out of its protective case, and after grabbing Kyrie Eleison – I wasn’t going to leave it – and tucking my helmet under my free arm, left to head back as soon as possible to the Storage Area and Merge with Shuuten Douji.

<p class="MsoNormal">“You’re not fighting with your Squad?” a puzzled Frank (or maybe Fred) questioned.

<p class="MsoNormal">I shrugged. “No. But they’ll be fine; I last saw them with Soma.” Not sure where they are right now, though, I thought. “And besides; I won’t be any help to them while newly recovering – yes, I’m just released, and no, you can’t do anything about it – and they won’t be any help fighting clumsily with their God Arc Soldiers.” Okay, I’m putting them down, but there’s a fragment of truth in that statement; they’re not as good as I want to.

<p class="MsoNormal">And what I want is them to surpass me.

<p class="MsoNormal">I parted ways with Fred (I finally figured which twin when I saw him approach the God Arc with white face paint; Frank had black on his) as I walked back to my own Soldier. I looked up at the Command Center and gave a wave, a way to tell them that we could begin Merging.

<p class="MsoNormal">I leaned Kyrie next to the steel frames supporting Shuuten Douji, and after making sure my Spear wasn’t about to fall over by herself, I clambered back up Shuuten Douji’s shoulder and slipped down the hatch. I fixed the helmet carefully over my head. I can’t help but jerk when needles pierced the base of my skull, at the back, and through the bone at the top of my vertebral column.

<p class="MsoNormal">See why no one is easily compatible with Prototypes? Because they don’t usually survive Merging.

<p class="MsoNormal">I black out for a moment, and when I regained my vision back, my gaze was settled over the floor of the Storage Area.

<p class="MsoNormal">Merging complete.

<p class="MsoNormal">I ran through the procedure maneuvers; making sure everything is functional. When I made sure that everything is working as it should, I delicately picked up Kyrie – she’s so small, holy shit – and placed her inside ‘my’ mouth. Parents say never to put sharp things in your mouth; I think I’m giving all of those parents one big, middle finger at the moment.

<p class="MsoNormal">But anyway, I keep Kyrie in my mouth, and with my now freed hands, I picked up the Buster Blade – I just realized the irony of using a Buster Blade God Arc, since Original himself specializes in one – and rested it on my shoulder.

<p class="MsoNormal">It was an oddity, the weight of the Fenrir flag on my bag. I honestly forgot how the DEMAS squad Captains managed to bully me into looking like a samurai. With the war banners and shit.

<p class="MsoNormal">I know Shuuten Douji attracts a lot of attention – well, with the different design from the regular God Arc Soldiers and the war banner – but as I approached the Deployment Gate, a regular God Arc Soldier lumbered over to me. Whomever piloting this one is a Squad Captain; the shoulder armor also bears the Fenrir Crest.

<p class="MsoNormal">“/Ryuuka-kun, the General says you take Squad 6 and 13 to defend the east side of the Wall./” I’m surprised; DEMAS Commander Sora Okamoto is someone I’ve only met once; and that was during my test when I joined the Riders. S/He (hey, the Commander’s real gender is one of FRIAR’s Seven Wonders) motioned to a group of ten Soldiers behind him/her. “/You are the most mobile out of the Riders; Sariels, Vajra and Garm packs litter the east./”

<p class="MsoNormal">As Shuuten Douji is incapable of any form of verbal communication, I simply nodded and stalked over to my temporary squad. They saluted, and I returned the gesture, before we fell in line when all of the DEMAS Rider –120 Riders total, my estimate – gathered at the Gate; the Commander at the very front.

<p class="MsoNormal">“/Gate opening in 30 seconds, ladies, so keep you panties on and fight like there’s no tomorrow!/” Commander barked harshly into the communications. “/Let’s show those trash the Fang of the Wolf! Let me hear you scream!/”

<p class="MsoNormal">I don’t know why Commander had started this little tradition of howling like wolves before missions, but whatever. The Soldiers opened their maws and howled, the floor beneath us actually shaking. I was positive that I roared the loudest – and it surprised me that Kyrie didn’t fall off – and after a few more howls, the Gates opened.

<p class="MsoNormal">And Pandemonium began.

<p class="MsoNormal">We jumped out row by row, and as Squad Leader (temporary as it is, I probably should assign an assistant and leave it in their hands) I jumped with the Commander and the other leaders.

<p class="MsoNormal">I begun running as soon as all the members of Squad 6 and 13 were deployed, and while they loped on three available limbs – one hand carrying their God Arcs, of course – I was the sole one who ran upright. It was the design; Shuuten Douji slimmer and having longer and rather spindly limbs. Fits my style, really.

<p class="MsoNormal">In no time at all, we reached our area, and the slaughter began.

<p class="MsoNormal">With a roar, I pounced on a Vajra just about to chomp down on a downed God Eater, grabbing it by its ‘cape’ and yanking back hard. Some of it tore, and the cat-like Aragami yowled in pain, twisting in an attempt to sink its teeth into me.

<p class="MsoNormal">Fuck that.

<p class="MsoNormal">I flipped over the Vajra, keeping a hold on its cape and with a great heave; pulled the Aragami up and over my head to slam it back-first on the ground. It stunned the cat, and I wasted no time in tearing apart the soft flesh with my hands.

<p class="MsoNormal">It kept clawing at me, and every second it would heal.

<p class="MsoNormal">So I stomped on its head viciously, crushing it and reducing it to a slimy mess. With the body going slack for a moment, I leaned down, and my chest armor opened to release my Predator. It honed on the softly pulsing Aragami Core, and it happily bit into it, Devouring it in less than a second.

<p class="MsoNormal">I turned to the rest of the Aragami.

<p class="MsoNormal">I hope there’s enough for me to achieve a massacre.

<p class="MsoNormal">--

<p class="MsoNormal">I don’t know how long I had engaged Aragami, kill Aragami, Devour, and repeat, but my communications buzzed to life and Miss Rachel’s voice came through.

<p class="MsoNormal">“/Ryuuka, good, I got through you./” Has she been trying to connect to me? I didn’t notice. “/''I’ve contacted your DEMAS squad mates and I’ve already told them I’ll have to pull you out there and move to where Blood is. They need your help.''/”

<p class="MsoNormal">Somehow, I feel shocked by that fact.

<p class="MsoNormal">“/''Move, now, they’ll be overrun! You have to help them!''/” Shit. Miss Rachel’s scared. Julius, Gil and the others must be in jeopardy.

<p class="MsoNormal">I tore the Sariel in two halves with a well timed Charge Crush, and after getting the Core, turned on my heel and bolted. I followed the coordinates Miss Rachel sent me. It was near, thankfully, but I began worrying when yes, they’ll be overrun if I don’t get there fast enough.

<p class="MsoNormal">SO I used the thrusters that were newly installed on my body, and though this is my first time using it, I didn’t feel any elation at the speed it gave me. After all, my squad mates are in danger.

<p class="MsoNormal">I saw the small, fragile figures of Julius and Hiro facing off against a Fallen Quadriga, and with a roar, I rammed my shoulder into its side, knocking it down and sending it skidding a few meters.

<p class="MsoNormal">Judging by the two Long Sword users’ lack of surprise at my sudden arrival, Miss Rachel had most likely alerted them beforehand. Much better.

<p class="MsoNormal">I pounced on the Quadriga, pinning it back down when it tried to stand, and I proceeded to rip of the missile pods, eliciting enraged roars from the Aragami. I only managed to rip of one before I finally managed to knock me away, its missile pod still in my grasp.

<p class="MsoNormal">I motioned to Julius and Hiro to stay behind me as the Quad finally got onto its feet and charge at us, and shifting my God Arc into its Gun mode, I chucked the missile pod at the Quadriga, and shot.

<p class="MsoNormal">I just covered the two God Eaters when the explosion’s shockwave reached us, and I couldn’t help the hiss that escaped me when the heat scorched my back brutally.

<p class="MsoNormal">When it was over, Julius and Hiro didn’t waste anymore second in darting out of my protective area to cut up the weakened Quadriga, and when they found the Core, Devoured it quickly.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Ryuuka!” I turned and looked down at Julius, a questioning growl rising from my chest. “My and Hiro’s communications are jammed! Can you please find the others? I last saw Ciel with First Unit at our 3 o’clock; Nana further up at the frontlines with Romeo for the vanguard teams; and Gil said he’d help out Forth Unit somewhere to our 7 o’clock! You don’t have to bring them all here, just check on them!”

<p class="MsoNormal">Ah, that’s the Julius I know. I nodded, and turned to check on Alencon first.

<p class="MsoNormal">I was lucky, I suppose, that they weren’t fighting far from where Julius and Hiro are. Soma was with them, and I saw multitudes of Zygotes and their variants and even Sariels getting gunned down without mercy either by stupefying accuracy or deceptively showy bullets.

<p class="MsoNormal">I approached Alencon, a quiet rumble building in my chest. I don’t think she’s hurt, but one could never be too careful in our line of work.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Ryuuka, sir, Ciel Alencon reporting status.” She sounded breathless, so I motioned for her to rest up for a moment as I handled the Aragami nearest to us; by whacking them into Soma’s direction where they ended up cut up brutally and Devoured. “Vitals stable, no fatal injuries; merely light nick here and there but otherwise completely fine. Permission to continue engaging enemy, sir?”

<p class="MsoNormal">I’m not sure if she remembers she’s Third Command, but whatever. I nodded, and left for Nana and Romeo.

<p class="MsoNormal">I didn’t even bother approaching them; the vanguard teams were doing well, and Commander Okamoto was with them and her/his personal team of Riders; Squad Zero. Squad Zero were made up of the most talented Riders, and I should have been a member of that Squad, only that I refused since my service was first and foremost to Blood. Not that I regret not joining Squad Zero.

<p class="MsoNormal">Shitty Gilbert was last, and I hoped to any holy beings out there that the idiot wasn’t off being an idiot.

<p class="MsoNormal">For someone who wears clothes dominantly in violet, Gilbert is hard to find. I’ve already spotted his perverted former squad mate (really? Knee-high? Obviously, he had never seen the beauty of A-Class Zettai Ryouiki) and the girl with bubblegum pink hair (I think the one who is known for her friendly fires and sadistic nature).

<p class="MsoNormal">“Oi, Ryuuka! Damn Gil went after the Rufus that showed up!” I swear my heart stopped. “Get to him, quick! The brat lured the damn thing over to the cliffs, you-“

<p class="MsoNormal">I didn’t even wait for Makabe to finish as I turned and sprinted with my full speed towards the place, abusing the limit of my thrusters. I cut down the Aragami that got in my way, not stopping for a moment to kill them thoroughly.

<p class="MsoNormal">Maybe it was the adrenaline, but getting to the barricade ruins seemed faster than I expected. I saw a small violet blur, and my heart loosened a bit when I realized Gil was safe. Injured, but safe.

<p class="MsoNormal">I skidded to a half right in front of the Rufus Caligula, deciding that this beautiful Aragami will be dead by the next twenty minutes. I took a deep breath, and bellowed.

<p class="MsoNormal">''No one’s touching my squad mates. Especially now that I remember why I was made''.

<p class="MsoNormal">--

<p class="MsoNormal">I kneeled on the ground on all fours, God Arc stabbed into the ground within arm’s reach. Steam issued from all over my body; the coolers working overtime to remove the heat from my body. It was painful; staying in Shuuten Douji even though the body is overheating, and I’m positive that when I come out, remnants of the burns would be visible on my body for the rest of the day.

<p class="MsoNormal">Gil let out a breathless laugh below me, lying down on his back as he too recuperated. His left leg was a mess, and with the weird angle to his right shoulder, it was dislocated. The gash on his stomach had long since closed; and that was something I was immensely thankful for.

<p class="MsoNormal">Our wounds were worth it; the Rufus lay dead on the ground, Core Devoured.

<p class="MsoNormal">“That,” Gil chuckled, pushing himself up with only a single arm. I growled at him worriedly; the idiot, he should stay still! “Was awesome. Remind me to gloat to Romeo about once we get back, hm? Man,” He clung to me – idiot, I’m still burning – as he limped over to his Spear, picking it up and using it as a crutch. “I’m so requesting a leave after I’m dispensed from the infirmary. Bastards just won’t roll over and die, would they?”

<p class="MsoNormal">He began to hobble out, and after growling in irritation, I picked up my God Arc and lumbered after him. I winced when my mangled left arm spiked with pain, and after a paused, decided to just rip it off. Gil looked over to me as I tossed the useless hunk of mangled metal, one eyebrow up.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Doesn’t that hurt?” He asked. I did my best imitation of a one-shouldered shrug in this body. “Huh, but Miss Leah said that what Shuuten Douji ‘feels’ you also-“

<p class="MsoNormal">''Thunk. Roll. Roll. Squelch. ''

<p class="MsoNormal">The headless corpse twitched, before dropping to the ground.

<p class="MsoNormal">Gil… bert…?

<p class="MsoNormal">“Ohahahaha! Man, that was so easy!” Silver hair. Male. Around 185 cm in height. Rectangular spectacles. A smile on his face. Pure white Spear. Pure white Spear stained with bright red blood. Gil’s blood. “Ah, hello there! Sorry for interrupting your conversation; I’m in a bit of a hurry. You see, my stupid plant’s plan was messed up, so I was forced to fix it myself. Hope you don’t mind.”

<p class="MsoNormal">Gil’s… blood. I looked down, and saw lifeless eyes looking at me, face frozen in surprise. Blood leaked out from where its neck should be.

<p class="MsoNormal">Gil’s killer. Gil’s killer. Someone killed Gil. In front of me.

<p class="MsoNormal">Hainne a bullet to the head Volkhardt dismembered Beatrix a grenade in the mouth Elfriede run over Alfons shot repeatedly In the chest Jannick both arms cut off neck snapped Luca fed to the dogs Ilse caught in an explosion Stephan a stab to the heart Ulrike blood loss internal damage Uncle Johannes by his own son’s hand –

<p class="MsoNormal">“Wait… Ahaha, is that you Ulrich?” ''Step step step stop. Someone touching my face. ''“Ahh… Yes, it’s you. It’s you. It’s you. Finally, it’s you.” Arms gently holding my face. “I’ve longed for you, mein  schön .”

<p class="MsoNormal">All I saw is 'red''. '''

<p class="MsoNormal">'''-- '''

<p class="MsoNormal">'LET ME FEEL YOUR HATE AHAHAHAHA '

<p class="MsoNormal">(btw, this chap was 7.3K words. Let me feel your love too ahahahaha)