User blog:Seieireppa/God Eater:Universitas, chapter 38: Between One and Zero, part 3

Feldman’s phantasmal image stood across from Nanako in her room, his voice piercing to Nanako’s core with harsh words of hidden truths.

“I’m surprised Sigma hasn’t told you of the world of possibility yet,” he began. “Although I suppose he likely imagined that the knowledge might cause you undue mental stress.”

“Shut up…” came Nanako’s whispered reply. “Just…”

“Back in 2067…” Feldman continued, “that was the day you met Sigma for the first time. He came to the Glasgow Branch to kill your mentor, Cyrus Casterfield, and stop the completion of the Gigantes cannon. However, with the awakening of the Gehenna, the two of you had no choice but to operate the cannon yourselves, using it and Sigma’s own powers to destroy it before it could do any further harm to the world. However…”

Feldman held his arms out to the side in a gesture of grandiose nature.

“…don’t you want to know what would have happened if the Gigantes had failed?”

Nanako averted her eyes from Feldman, even as she knew it wouldn’t do any good. She already "knew" anyway, she realized.

“On that day,” continued Feldman, “Sigma used his own body to power the Gigantes, firing the only round currently in the chamber—however, by some twist of fate, that round just barely missed. With Sigma lacking enough energy to charge an attack of his own in time, and with not enough time to load another round, the two of you could only watch as the Gehenna laid waste to the Glasgow Branch, but not before Sigma fused with you and gave you a God Arc of your own. From there, you were powerless to watch as the Gehenna ravaged the planet, reducing all of human civilization to ash and rubble.

“And oh no, that wasn’t all. You, with your newfound powers, gathered as many human survivors you could find and set up a colony for them to live, forming a resistance movement with a handful of other God Eaters to fight off a new threat. You called them Neo Aragami; they were born from the flesh of the Gehenna and scoured the planet looking for survivors. No one was spared from their wrath—no one without power, that is.

“And then, oh, and then…”  By this point, Feldman’s face was visibly joyful, absorbed in his own tale. “And then, you found other survivors! You teamed up with God Eaters from all over the world to undertake an operation to destroy the Gehenna once and for all as it lay sleeping… but what you found was that the Gehenna existed outside the flow of time itself. Left with no other options, you used an existing gate to travel back in time and intercept the Gehenna at the moment of its awakening, traveling inside its body to attack its core… but do you know the best part?”

By now, Nanako was silent, her eyes empty and downcast.

“You all made it to the core… but what you found was no organ, but rather a whirling mass of timelines, a nexus of worlds that were and worlds that could have been. Of course, your resolve wasn’t shaken, so you did the only sensible thing: you destroyed the Gehenna’s core, even though it meant your own death and the deaths of everyone on the planet! You erased your own timeline to set things right! What immense self-righteousness, Nanako Kawashima!”

Nanako looked up, staring at Feldman. “And what is your point in telling me all this, anyway?”

Feldman paused for a moment, before seeming to remember something.

“Oh, and do you remember the name Alan Croswell? How about Natasha Estheim, or Sasha Andersen? Do those names ring a bell to you, Nanako? Because believe me, they should…”

Nanako gritted her teeth. How could she forget those names? Alan Croswell was the bandit leader who had ruled the area around the Glasgow Branch. After Nanako’s departure from the Branch in 2074, she had routed Croswell’s band and brought him over to her cause, the two of them traveling the world together, defeating Aragami as they went.

And Sasha and Natalia? Nanako had encountered them while liberating a ruined city settlement from an Aragami menace. Sasha was an ace sniper, and Natalia was one of the brightest scientific minds of the age. Both of them had been instrumental in Nanako’s journey, standing by her side as she faced, well… that was a story for another time.

“What do they have to do with anything?” Nanako demanded.

Feldman merely grinned and widened his eyes.

“They were your most trusted lieutenants in that world, Nanako,” replied Feldman. “With those three at your side, you formed the core of the Rhizome, your colony of survivors, and fought the Neo Aragami together. Together, the four of you were an unstoppable force that covered every possible angle, every aspect of combat.”

Nanako stared at Feldman, aghast. The three of them had fought together in that other world, just as they had in Nanako’s own past?

Now, Nanako had to cope with the fact that she had just been informed of an entire other “her” who existed in another world, a world of what-ifs in which she had made something of herself as a savior of humanity. But now, here, in this world?

What did she have going for her?

“Nanako,” continued Feldman, as he approached Nanako and looked down at her, “I can give you this world, if you want. When I regain my full powers and bend the Horizon to my grasp, I can take you to this world. There, I guarantee that you’ll never have a moment of boredom, never a moment of wondering whether you could have been something… something more.”

As Feldman turned to leave, he glanced over his shoulder at Nanako. “I trust you’ll consider my offer at least?”

“Li… …ell…”

Feldman turned to face Nanako. “Come again?”

“Like HELL I’ll join you, you monster!” Nanako shouted, sending another punch flying futilely through Feldman’s head. “You’ve tried to kill my friends on multiple occasions, and that’s something I’ll NEVER fucking forgive! Get the hell out of here and never show your face before me again…”

Nanako gritted her fist and stared straight into Feldman’s eyes.

“…or I swear I’ll climb through time itself to kill you.”

At these words, Feldman let out a hearty laugh that filled the room.

“I look forward to you trying, little girl!” came Feldman’s boisterous reply. “Farewell, Nanako Kawashima!”

And with that, Feldman vanished into thin air, his words still ringing in Nanako’s head.

He was gone… for now. Nanako strode over to her bed and took a seat, still a bit overwhelmed by what she had heard.

Maybe… maybe if things had gone differently, Nanako wouldn’t have ended up here. In that case… where would Nanako be? How would her life have been different.

With a heavy heart, Nanako slumped onto her side, her eyes sliding closed as she drifted off to sleep…

<-- Previous chapter | Next chapter -->