Another Third Person POV. Next chap will be back to Ryuuka. And probably the penultimate chapter. Hiro gets the last :3.
~**~
Everything happened in exactly 4,458 seconds. Ulrich knows, because he had counted in the back of his mind. He knows, because those 4,458 seconds was all it took for his life – as false and as programmed it was – to go to literal hell. Those seconds were all it took for him to break further than he already was; his mind breaking itself to protect the body.
They were training in the recreational building; indulging their inner children with a game of Extreme Cops and Robbers. They managed to convince their caretakers – though it was mostly Ulrich doing the ‘haggling’ – to deactivate the electricity for the entire facility that night, making everything pitch black and the machinery inoperable for more challenge.
What was fun and games became horror.
The first missile hit the ground just a couple of inches from Ilse. The explosion caught the girl, and the last thing Ulrich saw of her was her fear stricken face, before promptly exploding into bits of flesh and blood.
Ulrich screamed, feeling some piece of him die the same time as his younger sister did, and then chaos.
Ulrich saw more and more of his sibling die before his very eyes, one after the other and soon enough, from the eleven, three remained.
Jannick was missing both arms, but he was still alive, eyes glowing as his will not to die (not just yet, not yet) flared. Ulrike was holding back her tears, head to toe drenched with blood and her hand clamped over her stomach, where her organs threatened to spill out. Ulrich was fine physically, but in his mind, he was breaking, bit by bit, so slowly, but it was imminent. If he wouldn’t die physically, he would die mentally.
4401, 4402, 4403, 4404-
“Ul, if… no, when you get out, run away as fast as you can.” Ulrich looked at Jannick, who was slowly dying, even if he continued to push back his time. Dread creeped up his throat, along with desperation in fear, and the Prototype grabbed the last of his siblings, holding them close as tightly as it would allow. “Clingy much? Heh, but anyway… Ul, you really need to survive this, even if we don’t.”
“No. I refuse. We’ll live, we can escape. Director must’ve heard of what happened here by now, we’ll-“
“Look at me Ul.” Ulrich did so, and he swallowed the urge to howl in grief, looking at Jannick’s dying form. “Can you really think we’ll survive like this? I’m slowly dying from blood loss, Ulrike dying from internal damage. You should live on for us.”
“No… No!” Ulrich reached out once more, clinging to what he knew were the last moments of his siblings. Eight pieces of him already died with the others; he knew he wouldn’t be able to take anymore if Jannick and Ulrike were to leave him, too. “We’ll survive, just trust me, I’ll get us-“
“I… I’ll always love Big Brother…” Ulrike breathed softly, and Ulrike suppressed a pained whine. “He wasn’t sunshine and rainbows, but I love him… all the… same. I love-“ Ulrich froze when Ulrike let out pained whimpers, before falling slack.
She didn’t move.
Ulrich was crying now, another part of him dying.
“Heh, Ullie decided to g-go before me, huh?” Jannick swallowed thickly, speaking in that same, nonchalant tone. “You shouldn’t follow us, Ulrich. Or not yet. We haven’t met Original, after all. We 1 to 10 may die, but you’re the Prototype. Uncle can rebuild us; he only needs you. You should continue, for us, Uncle, for Original and of course… For this world.”
“But I can’t…” Ulrike wheezed through his crying, arms tightening around Jannick’s body and Ulrike’s cooling corpse. “You guys are-“
“Oh, stop being such a pansy.” Jannick chastised weakly. “You’re strong… you’ll live. You can have more siblings. You’ll be their… Ah, what did Alfons say in Japanese…? Oh, yeah, “Onii-sama’. Hehe, that sounds so ridiculous.”
4,428, 4,429, 4,430-
“I’ll be honest with you Ulrich. I’m scared as fuck. I don’t want to die, and I still can’t believe this happened.” Jannick drew in a shaky breath, and Ulrich sobbed harder, still quiet as he forced himself not to make any sounds. “I-I’m scared. I want to meet Original, I want to mess around with you guy mores, I want to experience more Christmas with you, I want to celebrate my first hunt with you, I-!”
Ulrich placed his hand over Jannick’s eyes, momentarily letting go of Ulrike to move his other arm to place it around Jannick’s neck. The dying boy drew in a shuddering breath, tears flowing unbidden from his eyes.
“You should sleep now, Jannick.” Ulrich had finally removed his emotions from his duty. And this path was the only solution left for Jannick. “You should rest.”
“Yeah…” Ulrich gave Jannick a moment to prepare himself. “Ul?”
“Yes?”
“I love you. All of you.” Jannick smiled, more akin to his former smiles; full of contentment and joy. “I’m glad I was given a chance to live.”
4,451, 4,452, 4,453, 4,454-
“I’m glad I have all of you.” Ulrich responded. “Good night, Jannick.”
A sharp twist, and Jannick joined the rest of Ulrich’s siblings.
4,456, 4,457, 4,458.
The last piece gone, Ulrich surrendered to his grief.
He kissed the two corpses goodbye, and disappeared.
~**~
“Hello Amamiya-san.” Ryuuka said sadly. “Apologies for a disastrous first meeting.”
“But…” Lindow carefully turned around in place, looking at the ‘room’ with apparent befuddlement. “… What…?”
“Trust me, I don’t know either.” Ryuuka replied. He shifted, leaning on one leg, and the creeping horde of living plants shifted with him, clinging more to his form. “But I guess you could say this is a physical manifestation of a mindscape. Not sure how it came to be but… I don’t have a single clue about Resonance.”
“Usually Resonance… Argh, I don’t know.” Lindow looked at Ryuuka, and the ‘Ryuuka’ standing beside the older. “So, why are you like that? More importantly, why are there two of you?”
The older Ryuuka didn’t speak immediately, only looking down at his other self. After a minute, he sighed, and looked back up at Lindow, resignation and tiredness in his eyes.
“You better wake up, Amamiya-san.” He said, “I’ll follow soon.”
“Wait, Ryuuka-!”
Everything was washed out by white, and Lindow awakened with a violent gasp
--
The small lounge in the medic bay was small, and when Cradle and Blood squeezed in there, it gave the illusion of being smaller.
Off to one side sat the entirety of Cradle (with the exception of Sakuya, who had left to nurse her baby), the three conscious New Types sitting together – Alisa bearing a disturbed expression on her features, Lenka with a nervous one and Ryo with something akin to worry – Tsubaki near them leaning against the wall. Her expression was closed off, and her eyes betrayed no emotion. Soma was leaning against the wall, far from the others, but the man was wound tight with tension.
Blood’s reactions were not as controlled, having none of Cradle’s experience and detachment for these kinds of occurrences. They were frightened, panicked, and emotions were running high. Too high in fact.
“You know,” Gilbert’s voice was deceptively calm, but the edge and tightness to it never went unnoticed. He slowed down his pacing, resting wide, crazed eyes at Hiro. Gilbert looked like he was half a step away from assaulting Hiro – anything, really, everything was a bit foggy after all – and his tenseness affected everyone, whether they wanted to or not. “It’s your fault all this shit happened.”
Hiro jerked back, as if slapped. He narrowed his eyes at the older male, not impressed and not happy. “My fault?” He hissed. Romeo laid a hand on his junior’s shoulder, but Hiro wasn’t to be deterred. “You say it’s my fucking fault?! I’m not the one who went around killing people, Gil-san!” Hiro spat back.
“You could have at least heard him out!!”
“And hear more lies?! No thanks.”
“Don’t act as if you know him like I do, Hiro!” Gil snarled, barely held back by Julius as the taller of the two surged forward, as if wanting to inflict bodily harm on the younger God Eater. “Three guesses on who is his childhood friend!”
“Oh really? Then three guesses who is the bastard who didn’t know said childhood friend was alive all this time!” Hiro spat back, just as venomously. “You keep on defending that sick, lying son of a bit-“
Everyone looked up when the sound of a slap resounded, cutting off Hiro’s swearing abruptly, and they were met with the sight of Ciel in front of Hiro, her hand raised and the male’s head tilted to the side, eyes wide and disbelieving. His right cheek was bright red.
Hiro touched his stinging cheek carefully, looking at Ciel is silence. The snow-haired girl stared back unflinchingly, eyes empty of emotions.
“That is quite enough, Hiro.” She murmured quietly. “You’re behaving irrationally,” She turned to Gil, who still had a look of surprise on his face. “You as well, Gilbert. Professor Rachel would be most displeased with the attitude we’re showing. In front of others, no less. Look forward to severe disciplining.”
The silence that followed was both incredulous and surprised; Blood and Cradle respectively.
“Ciel…” Hiro’s tone took on a betrayed one, as if Ciel chastising them meant that she had abandoned him. “… How could you be so calm?”
“Because someone needs to be.” Ciel answered quietly. “Instead of asking questions like ‘why did Ryuuka leave in the first place’ or ‘whose fault Ryuuka left’; how about we ask ‘why did Ryuuka become like that’?” Here, Ciel turned her gaze on Cradle, the God Eaters of said group straightening and meeting the younger God Eater’s questioning look.
“It happened suddenly; too fast to properly keep track of, really.” It was Lenka who answered, brows furrowed together and expression hard. “One moment we were talking, and when Lindow touched Izanami-kun’s hair, the guy suddenly dropped like a marionette with its strings cut,” Here he lifted a hand and with two fingers, emulated a scissor opening and closing. “And after that… he was suddenly screaming and his arm and eye exploded.”
“That’s the barebones explanation for it,” Everyone jumped and whirled to face the new voice, and Cradle surged to their feet when Lindow leaned against the wall, pale faced and haggard. Tsubaki was beside her brother in a heartbeat, allowing him to lean most of his weight against her. “But to elaborate; I Resonated with him.”
“What?!” Alisa jumped to her feet, a look of horror on her face. “Lindow-san Resonated?”
“Yes, Alisa.” Lindow replied tiredly, groaning in relief when Tsubaki sat him down on the couch, taking the spot Ryo just vacated. “Turns out my Resonance allow me to enter a ‘physical manifestation’ of a person’s subconscious. And before you lot ask, no, I wasn’t hurt.”
“Physical manifestation…? What did you do, Lindow-san?” Alisa asked urgently. Blood could only look on in confusion, not understanding what their elders where talking about.
“I tried looking for Ryuuka’s conscious. I found him alright.” Lindow grimaced, leaning back against the couch and closing his eyes. “Found ‘im alright…”
“What do you mean ‘found him’? Ryuuka?” Julius queried, speaking on behalf of his squad. “We don’t follow.”
“Ah… Right, no one ever told you about the 2nd Generation…” Lindow muttered, before waving a hand. “That should be an explanation for another day, I think. But I got somewhat good news.”
Tsubaki narrowed her eyes at her brother, towering over him. “’Somewhat’? Better pray it is good, Lindow.”
Lindow merely smiled; neither happy nor derisive. Just tired. “Ryuuka told me he’ll ‘follow soon’. I assume he’s talking about after I wake up, as that was what he told me before saying he’ll follow.” Everyone looked dubious, and Lindow could only shrug. “So I vote we all calm the heck down, chill for a bit, and let the kid rest up, hm? Sounds good? Captain, Vice-Captain, Blood Captain and Blood Vice-Captain, what say you?”
While Julius and Hiro looked alarmed and at a loss for being addressed, Ryo and Lenka exchanged glances, nodding when they found the same thought reflected in their eyes.
“Agreed.”
Hiro gave Julius a pleading look, and Julius sighed deeply. “We second.”
So the gathered God Eaters settled to wait, no matter how agonizing and nerve-wracking it was.
~**~
How long was it now…? An hour? A day? Or maybe perhaps a year?
I don’t know, I’m not sure.
I miss them.
I miss them horribly.
Hainne, Volkhardt, Beatrix, Elfriede, Alfons, Jannick, Luca, Ilse, Stephan, Ulrike. I miss every single one of them. Wait, who are they again? I know names… but I don’t have a face to associate to… Oh dear, this is bad. How am I supposed to know who is who? I doubt Uncle-
Uncle.
Director.
Uncle-Director.
UncledirectoruncledirectoruncledirectoruncledirectorunclediretorWHOISHE??!
Why is my mind patchy? I can’t think properly. I want to die. No, I want to live, but I also want to die. Can’t I choose properly? What is wrong with me? I think it’s everything, but I don’t know what ‘everything’ is.
I hope someone can tell me.
Original.
Original… what is ‘Original’…? No… who is ‘Original’? I can’t seem to properly remember… But I remember cold eyes. I find them captivating. I don’t know why. I always feel like I should follow those eyes. Why? Why can’t I remember? This is very bad… Uncle(Director) wouldn’t be happy.
Wait, why am I standing before a whirlwind? This is strange. I’ve never seen this before, only…
Steel walls.
Lots of steel walls.
I saw blue skies once, I think, but I can’t be sure anymore.
This tornado is beautiful. I hate it.
But if it’s beautiful, why do I hate it? Maybe because it’s beautiful? No, I don’t think so. I must be reminding me of something, only I can’t bring it to the front of my mind. Mr. Brain isn’t cooperating. Which is bad.
… What is bad again?
Ah, there’s a monster. I have to hide. Good that it didn’t see me.
I don’t think I can’t handle monsters very well. I’ll be gobbled up. I don’t like that.
But I want to eat them. Looking at them makes me hungry. Why? I don’t know.
I don’t know a lot of things, I noticed. Why is that? I don’t look like a kid… I think I’m forgetting something. I’m forgetting a lot of somethings, actually. This is very strange.
But I’m tired. I want to sleep. So I lied down, and fainted.
--
I woke up. White. Too much white. There’s a mask over my mouth. I can’t move my mouth with that on. I removed it.
It hurts to move. Why? Was I hurt? I think so. If I wasn’t hurt, I won’t hurt. But why was I hurt again?
…
I don’t remember.
“Ulrich…” I didn’t noticed this man. Who is he? Oh… Wait. I think I remember.
He’s ‘Director’.
Or was he ‘Uncle’…?
It’s not his name… what is his name? What is Director/Uncle’s name? I can’t quite remember.
“Ulrich, Ulrich, I’m sorry, so, so sorry… I’m sorry…” Why is he apologizing? Because I was hurt? Strange... no one cared before. I think there was this brown haired boy…
Uncle/Director kept apologizing for a good while, then he fell quiet. I never said a word. Then he said that I was sick, and I would be remembering things in a couple of weeks. How long is a ‘couple of weeks’? I don’t know.
He gave me a picture before leaving. I was in the middle, at the very bottom. The others… it’s strange, with the way they look a lot like me. Is this some kind of uniform? No, our clothes are different. Did I know them? Maybe. I was smiling in the picture. As were the others. The sight of them smiling made me smile too. It hurt, but it was nice to smile.
But why do I feel like crying…?
~**~
The moment Acting Director Sakaki delivered the good news of Ryuuka’s situation; Blood couldn’t have been more relieved.
Whatever happened to him – involving the exploding body parts; Cradle had admitted to severing the… limb. It wasn’t an infection, thankfully, but it was admittedly very concerning – had amped Ryuuka’s physical capabilities significantly, and along with that, his regenerative ability. In junction with medical science and transfusion of Oracle Cell-infused blood (strangely enough, Soma was the only one who was said to be compatible), Ryuuka’s arm would be regenerated in around two weeks, while his eye would be fixed in three days.
It’s been roughly five days since the news were delivered, and though Ryuuka has been moved from the ICU to a regular – if a rather private – room to recuperate more swiftly, the gray haired God Eater had yet to awaken. But even then, seeing Ryuuka face whole and clean – albeit still scarred, though said scars had somewhat faded for some reason – was comforting. It was nice to know he wasn’t in danger any more. Blood fervently hoped that nothing bad would happen again. To anyone of them.
They’d be prepared, of course, but that doesn’t rid the horror and fear. It might never go away, even.
Gil, of course, had stayed in Ryuuka’s room the most; only leaving for meals or missions and keeping his hygiene, but other than those, his time was spent in the quiet, dull room. His inability to stay away from Ryuuka was understandable, though. He had lost Ryuuka once – 11 years ago – and it was obvious to see that Gil was terrified when it came close to a second-time.
Julius and (surprisingly) Ciel also came frequently, mostly to check up on the two childhood friends and the progress of Ryuuka’s arm’s healing. Though Ryuuka had trained himself to be ambidextrous, as a Spear specialist, both of his arms are essential to his fighting style. Not to mention Ryuuka’s sense of balance relied on having a complete set of limbs. While Julius frequented due to his duty to his subordinates as their Captain – it was clear there was a good measure of guilt thrown in the mix too – Ciel mostly did it to ensure that Ryuuka would have a complete recovery and not hinder Blood in the future. It seemed cold – if not outright uncaring of the man’s situation – but then again, Ciel was raised in the military.
Romeo and Nana drops by now and again, and they never stay too long. Whether the cause was guilt or they’re still affected by Ryuuka’s… exploits, no one mentioned anything.
Hiro only visited once. Gil hadn’t forgiven the younger for insulting Ryuuka, and Hiro hadn’t forgiven Gil for accusing him.
Tension just as high as before, but there was open malice and the want for violence this time. It was a lot worse. Even Ciel or Julius are powerless to stop either party if it came down to physical violence; it was merely that the two had a shred of propriety that stopped them from outright attacking each other like animals.
Cradle had long gone back outside the Aragami Wall; the Kyuubi simply begging for their attention. They had insisted at least one of them remain, but the Acting Director only allowed one of them visit for a day, once a week. The light-haired man was glad that as Blood’s seniors, they were looking after the younger God Eaters; but even then, Acting Director Sakaki was adamant about Cradle not getting sidetracked. More so that the veteran God Eaters were coming into contact with the Kyuubi more often.
So when Ryuuka finally deigned himself fit to rouse, Blood – with the exception of Hiro – were all but scrambling to get to their team mate.
“Ryuuka?! Are you up?!” Gil demanded as soon as he barged through the door, not bothering with his manners. The nurse in the room hissed at him like a threatened cat, but the eldest Blood member ignored her in favor walking towards the cot.
The God Eater lying there jerked in surprise, one eye wide open in shock and the other hidden – once more – by his favorite black eye patch. His mouth formed a small ‘o’, as if he wasn’t expecting the rest of Blood to arrive. Or visit at all, for that matter.
“Took your time, you asshole.” Gil growled (without heat, of course, he was simply just glad) and he crossed his arms instead of reaching over to whap the younger on the back of his head. “Did the princess get enough beauty sleep?” He mocked.
“Gilbert, please play nice.” Ciel reproached flatly, moving to an open seat to claim. She looked at Ryuuka, expression inscrutable. Ryuuka continued to look at each one of them carefully and with a generous amount of shock. “How do you feel?”
When the gray-haired God Eater’s silence stretched on for too long, they began to worry, as did the nurse. The nurse began to usher them out, to Blood’s disappointment, when Ryuuka talked at last.
“N-no…” He reached out, grasping feebly and desperately, eyes a little glazed. “Don’t g-go! Please, please, don’t leave, don’t leave, not again, please-“
“Hey, hey.” Gil wasted no time in taking the smaller hand as he sat on the bed. He grimaced as he made eye contact with the others; the situation was the same as their younger years; when Ryuuka would suddenly collapse mentally and his fears laid open. This frightened God Eater wasn’t the proud Ryuuka he knew. It was unsettling. “Shh, we’re here, we’re here. Don’t go crying on me now, wuss. And what’s with the ‘not again’?” Gil looked down confusedly at Ryuuka, who had frozen for a second. “If you mean that time when we had a fallout, get your facts straight; I never left. Stupid.”
Gray brows furrowed, the lone eye darting from one face to another. “You... You’re not them…” Ryuuka rasped, body suddenly sagging. “I-I thought…”
“Okay, you’re being weird.” Gil pushed the body that sagged against him, watching Ryuuka’s vacant eyes stare at nothing over his shoulder. “Hey, idiot, snap out of it! Ryuuka!”
The intensity of that pink eye that suddenly met Gil’s gaze was chilling, and Gil tried very hard not to shudder.
“Ryuuka Izanami is dead. I am not him.”
They fell deathly silent; incredulous, confused and shocked at the words.
“Ryuuka, are you still loopy from your meds? I think we should-“
“I am neither suffering from disorientation, hallucination nor insanity, Gil. I am perfect fine.” Ryuuka (who claims that Ryuuka Izanami is dead) interrupted firmly. “In fact, I can attest to the fact that the ‘person’ identified as Ryuuka Izanami has been deceased since November 1, 2062. He disappeared that day; and never found since. Ryuuka Izanami didn’t even leave behind a corpse; but I know that he’s dead.”
Gil stood up, tightening his grip on the hand he held, and he scowled when the ‘Ryuuka’ he was looking down didn’t even react, even when a bone snapped. Gil largely ignored the nurse now hissing and flailing, enraged that Gil further injured her patient. “Cut the bullshit.” He snarled. “You come back home looking like someone butchered you, give us a right scare and wake and say you’re not Ryuuka? What, amnesia? Sure, physical trauma can do that, but I can smell the lie you’re giving off. Ryuuka.”
The man on the bed smiled humorlessly. “Ryuuka is dead.” He repeated, sounding amused. Gil had half a mind of pulling the other arm out of its socket. “He was merely a figment of my imagination, after all.”
Gil turned to the nurse, not minding the way she glowered at him. “Hey, got any tranqs here? I think this idiot went over the edge.” The nurse glanced at the still smiling ‘not-Ryuuka-as-he-claims’, before nodding brusquely. “Gotta call the Doctor.”
A now, disturbed Blood left the room slowly, Gil twisting the hand in warning. His eyes narrowed when the not-Ryuuka smiled. Almost manically. The brunette finally about-faced, crossing the threshold in just a few strides when he stopped abruptly when not-Ryuuka spoke again. “You can ask the high-ranking Scientists, you know. Mention the keyword ‘BFC’. Number Double-Zero.” A thoughtful pause. Gil looked over his shoulder, frowning when the guy touched the stump that is his growing left arm. It had already grown to form the beginnings of the elbow, and Gil was a bit nauseated by the sight of the ivory white bone peeking out. “Mention the name… ‘Ulrich Diener’.”
Gil turned to him. “What the fuck are you talking about?!”
The smile was full of teeth, and it wasn’t nice. “Proofs of Ryuuka Izanami’s death, silly.” For a moment, the pink eye glowed, demented in the naturally dim light of his room. “Then you’ll know… You’ve never met a ‘Ryuuka Izanami’.”
Gil snarled, slammed the door behind him and strode off; away from the manic laughter taunting him from the end of the hallway.
He missed the sad grimace that followed, of course.
--
THIS. S**T. WAS. HARD.
And I’m ashamed that the one that gave me the most trouble was the confrontation with Gil and Hiro. Would you believe that I don’t know how to make a logical argument? Snarling and snarking, yeah, I can do that, but proper, rage-filled, hellfire inducing arguments? Nuh-uh. Count me out.
So I tried imagining my folks arguing.
Turns out that technique is a bust; I realized I have no clue how my parents fight. I mean, ‘wtf, did you guys really fight?? Why are you sitting in the dining room sipping tea like wtf???’ and so it resulted to WRITER’S BLOCK. It deserves the caps, I swear.
Oh, and I might’ve done a marathon of Tokyo Ghoul. KouAki FTW NYAHAHAHA
Bye
PS: Ryuuka gone cray, lol. I regret nothing. Oh, and ARC 2 is ending in two – TWO – chapters! By now this fic should’ve reached… more or less 70K worth of words. Woooooooooooooooooooooooooh!! I hope I can get this to 100K!